Sunday, April 30, 2006


Word of the week: 'Football'

It's in my thoughts but I can't express them for fear of getting abused. Thankfully, the end of the season is nigh. I can hold on.

Phrase of the week: Done/done/done.

Don Quixoite is finished. 944 pages long. It's taken me since February to do it but I'm glad I did. I'm not sure the Knight of the Sorrowful Figure is as mad as everyone believes he is. Unusual, certainly but towards the end, some other bloke is trying to impersonate him. Surely, the impersonator is the mad one. As for Sancho, well he talks only in proverbs and for that he must be applauded. Entertaining to the end.

Sight of the week: 'Pass'

Don't go on Stag Nights. They turn messy and you often end up drinking much more that you wanted to. You end up losing too much money at poker and when the porn finally ends up on the tv you end up thinking 'my did she do that?' And then you pass out on the floor. Fun aged 24. Not fun aged 29.

Rant:Abusive Tirade of the week: 'Trying not to'

Trying not to be intolerate. Trying to be understanding and a more caring human being. But to tell you the truth, it's hard particularly when you get people who clearly don't care about anything. How else can you quantify a student coming into your test and not being able to do anything apart from saying 'I don't know'. I didn't even let him get to part 4. What was the points. Thank you and goodnight. You have 0 points.

Song of the week: 'Losing my edge' by LCD Soundsystem

This has been nominated before and will no doubt be nominated again but it's the sort of song you play when you are a narky, 'i'm the dogs' bollocks' kind of mood. Then turn up the volume. A hipster baiting classic.

Hidden Message of the week: 'I heard that you have a compilation of every good song ever done, by anybody.'

Saturday, April 29, 2006


There are 2 teams that I really can't be doing with. One English, one Scottish. Both, strangely play in blue. I think that is where the comparisions end.
The Scottish team is Kilmarnock.

Granted, they have a very compact, modern stadium but that's it. They couldn't fill the stadium even if they gave away free tickets - which they have done. However, the biggest pet hate is the fact that they can beat anyone in the league apart from the 'big' 2 - Rangers and Celtic. Not only is that true of this season but virtually every season. That's what does my nut. Why are they incapable of even drawing with these teams? It's like they have a total mental block...there have been times when you need Kilmarnock to do you a favour alas, there is more chance of Bushy boy coming out and saying 'sorry, I think we made a mistake'. Hope they get relegated.

And the English team. Surprise, surprise. Chelsea.
Yes, they have just one the League for the 2nd successive time but I could win if I had a limitless amount of money to spend as they have. 'Hmm, I think I'll spend £24 million on Drogba so he can continually annoy half the Premiership by his acting prowse' or 'Yep, Wright-Phillips for £21 million to warm the bench just so another team can't have him'. But, it all looks like greed in it's most pure form. And just because they can. The Champions League has avoided them like the plague, yet teams that don't spend as much money have succeeded. Liverpool and Porto have done it on a fraction of the budget. Even Arsenal could win it with their 'youngsters'. Surely, it's about moulding a team and not splashing the cash.

I can appreciate teams that have done in the past through teamwork, creativity, skill, passion and most of all luck. Liverpool of the early 80's, Ajax in the 70's even the Celtic team of the late 60's but Chelsea. No amount of 'charming' could put them up there. Perhaps history will dictate that the are one of the great teams. They are though, a long way off.

Friday, April 28, 2006


What kind of pisser are you?
Blunt but a fair question.
Imagine the seen. A row of 3 urinals. All 3 are not being used and you are the sole occupt of the toilet. Which one do you use?

The furthest from the door is one option. The one closet the door, another option. Or the one in the middle. I would probably go for the middle. It's a power thing. If someone else comes in, then you are forcing them to choose the one to your right or left. If I am using the one on on the left or the right, then it's his decision, not mine. 1-0 to the pf. However, if he's in there first. He's in the middle. Left or right? The only thing to think about is which one is closer to the door. I'm not using the closet. Yet, if he is on the left or right, which one - next to him or not. If I'm feeling cocky /no pun intended/ and I don't know hime, I'm next to him. If it's an older Korean bloke, then I'm not next to him. If it's one of my students, not next to him.

But then, it's often true that there are more than 3 urinals and they are not always in a line instead they can be in 2 lines with a row in each line. In any case, where do you go? Closest to the door or all the way to the end? I'd go half way or perhaps 3/4's of the way up. Again, someone is there already. Same side? Probably not. But, if there are a few people in already, I'd balance it up and play the position thing by ear although next to or space between? Depends on a few factors. Again you don't know until it happens.

Once the urinal has been selected. Are you a 'get it finished' as quickly as possible or do you take it at a leisurely pace? Depends on numbers and time factors. Plus, what effect does another bloke have? No effect? Or is there is a slight hesitition in the 'flow'. Alittle moment of what seems like an unnatural amount of time for it to start to flow.

Also, eyes straight ahead or a casual look around or eyes to the floor whilst in flow? I'd go with a combination of all 3. You need to know what's around, just in case. You need to know that it's flowing to were it should and not over your shoes and then there's the 'I'm ignoring everyone 'cos I'm pissing' straight ahead stare.

And 1 final point. Closed stance, open stance or a hand or 2 on the wall infront to steady yourself?

Tell you what, it's a minefield. One slight ill timed look or action could be misinterpreted and you really wouldn't want that now, would you.

Thursday, April 27, 2006


Oh yeah...slight mistake. Yesterdays result was 5-3 and not 4-3 as previously reported. Got a bit confused because we scored to make it 4-3 but then they wanted to play 'Golden Goal' i.e. next goal the winner. I think not since we're already winning. Another great idea by the 'captain'. Shut up mate.

Was reading that there was a shooting not too far away from my Grandmothers house. It's not the best area in Edinburgh but a shooting. My goodness, that's unusual. Seems like there was some kind of family feud that boiled over last Saturday. Not sure of the exact details but one family was out drinking in the local pub when members of the other family came into the pub, wandered around and then let fly with thier guns. I think 1 person was killed and another injured /might be wrong though/. Anyway, an eyewitness suggested that the 'shooters' came into the pub as they often did as they were regulars. They both had woolly hats on there heads but upon spotting the people they were to hit, they pulled the woolly hats down to 'disguise' themselves before shooting.

Thing is, 1. They were regulars. 2. They cruised the pub with their hats 'up' and 3. Pulled the hats 'down' immediately prior to shooting.

Did they bank on all the eyewitnesses suddenly coming down with amnesia or something?
Did they think that they wouldn't be recognised?

If you're going to top someone at least try to it incognito. It reduces the chances of getting caught.
That's Gracemount for you.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006


Another dayanother game of football.
This time, we had enough for 2 teams to play each other which is somewhat surprising but in reality, not really.

There seems to be a few interwoven sub-plots starting to emerge hence the larger than normal turn out.

Perhaps I've mentioned before that there is a University Sports Day next month which I'm hoping to play in with the team - the ones who come on a regular basis. The ones who don't come regularly, I feel shouldn't be able to simply demand to play irrespective of ability and 'rank' /ie. 1st year, 2nd year etc student./

So, I've been trying to get us into that.

But, the English Department has a 'Captain'. A student who is 'in charge' of the students. Now, he has never come to football whether for a game or for practice. So, he might not even get in.
Alas, it seems that he has taken /or perhaps been told/ to take it upon himself to enter an football team into this Sports Day under the guise of the 'English Department Team'.

This is slightly cheeky, given that I was the one who started this 'English Department Team'. I'm the one who organises the practices, hires the pitch and posts the messages and E-mails the other students. In essence, all the work that has been put into it so far, is about undone

I'm not sure what is going on behind the scenes but at football today, he gets everyone together and talks about the Sports Day but then tells me that I can't play in the Sports Day.
Do you want a bet, my son.
Take me on. I dare you.
If 'my' Team doesn't play, and I'm not in the loop, then there will be trouble and the Boss will be questioned at length and in no uncertain terms.
Anyway, we had the 1st/2nd years (and me) against the 3rd/4th years today. We won 4-3...should have been more but a it is a win.
1st half I was in the 'Neil Lennon' role infront of the defence. The defence played o.k. and I was more confident in their abilities!
Had a couple of offside calls with guess who - the Captain haha. I was the last man. I was in line with him when he crossed the ball but there were 2 of his team beyond me. Easily 2 or 3 yards offside. He wanted to argue the point but come on...if you don't know the rules of the bloody game, don't get into a debate about it.
2nd half...I was moved to centre foward. This time, I was more involved and had a couple of half chances. The 1st was me chasing a 'lost cause'. The defender thought the goalkeeper had it and vice versa. I nicked in and pushed it away but pushed it towards the bye line. Tight, tight angle to shoot from...hit the opposite post. 2nd chance was a corner. Right height to volley but got ahead of it and didn't it cleanly enough to threaten the goal.
But, the real talking point is this Sports Day carry on. If I 'lose' this little intrique, well who knows..

Saturday, April 22, 2006


Have you ever tried to google your name?

I'm surprised to find that 'I' have over 21 million entries. I wonder if any of them are actually 'me'. Probably not. I'm not about to try and locate myself.

Tried to google a few of my mates as well. One of them - yes, that's you Ms. Mcg. - has only 556 entries. That's of them must be you or someone related to you!

I guess that begs the do you make it to the top of the search?

I would quite like to get from number 19, 120, 402 /if I'm even on the list/ upto number one on the google search. Maybe I need to get myself in the news headlines or do something completely random.

Clearly, I've got too much time on my hands.

Friday, April 21, 2006


It is quite funny looking into Korean culture from our 'outsider' point of view. I guess what's normal for the locals is somewhat odd to us and equally vice versa. I guess that's we all moan and complain about each other.

Some things though are universal and are not bound by borders or cultural differences. Like diverting slush funds into friends and relatives Bank Accounts. In anyones book, it's fraud.

In anyones book, fraud is a criminal offence yet prosecuting the offence is somewhat complex and often hard to prove.

Yet, Hyundai Motors and there owners are at it again. Fraud. Millions of pounds being moved from one place to another. They get busted and what happens. The Police announce that they will question them not immediately but the day after telling everyone that they want to talk to them thus giving the 'accused' time to prepare their 'defence'. What's that about?

Furthermore, instead of admitting guilt or anything, the Owners announce that they are going to donate 1 trillion Won to 'society'. That's nice of them. What exactly is 'society' though. Is that buying dinner for all their mates or the Police or building a statue or repairing some roads.

A nonsense.
Get them arrested and tried in a Court of Law like everyone else. Just because they have money and status does not mean they are above the Law. And paying to get out of it.

That's not cultural. It's criminal.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Wednesday, April 19, 2006


Concerned. Again. That's twice in a week and it's only Wednesday.
Although, perhaps I shouldn't be.
If I had a test of any sort, I would try. It might be a 'hardcore, I'm doing this at all costs' kind of try but I would at least make some kind of effort to do myself justice. This would go for things that I wasn't really that interested in. For example, in my own Uni. days we did all sorts of semester long courses that I was crap at. Process Control being one and some kind of Computer Programming thing. Both, I knew that I would be lucky to do well in. In the end I passed both purely because I was not failing them. Period.

Yet, with my own students, I am fully aware that they have no choice in taking English. They have to take a years' worth of it. So, when I'm planning my tests, this is in the back of my mind. As a consequence, I tend to make my tests not too difficult but difficult enough to weed the great from the good and the triers from the non-triers. If you come to class, you will have done everything that will be in the test.

What I can't quite understand is students who come to class and absolutely bomb the test. You can just tell that they haven't done any work at home for it and are utterly unprepared.
1 guy inparticular. Second year /probably failed English before/ comes to class. Tends to smile alot. A clear sign that 1. he has no idea what's going on and 2. he fancies himself as a bit of a playboy. Anyway, comes to the test. Can't do anything. Can't even say a word in English. Utter crap. Gets 1 point out of a possible 20. What was the point in coming to my test and even the class if you are going to do nothing?

He will being getting an 'F' even if he continues to turn up every week. I wonder if whoever is paying his tutition fees know that he is resitting and failing English. I wonder if his other classes are the same or if it is only my class that gets this special treatment.
On the flipside, you get the students who have worked their ass off...get a good score and let out a cheer when they leave the room. That cheers me up.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006


Actually, quite concerned.
I've made 4 women cry in the last 2 weeks. 5 if you could that student from weeks ago, who was only looking for my sympathy.
Seems like I suddenly have an innate ability to do this. It's not like I mean to, it just happens.
Plus, it's not like I even shout or ball at them, in fact I've been quite nice to them, before the actual waterworks begin.

Admittedly, 2 of them have been students. The 1st because I docked points off of her because her phone went off in class and the 2nd because I told her that she was late. And she was. The 3rd, well I think was 'time of the month' time which is a bad since hormones and the like are not at 'normal' levels - haha, like I have any knowledge of what I'm talking about. And the 4th. Alcohol induced despite her protestations that she wasn't drunk. yeah, yeahyeah.

I am concerned by this state of affairs. It's not big and not clever but I really didn't do much to bring it on. I guess getting a reaction from a bird is better than not getting any.../

Monday, April 17, 2006


Oh that time of year. The Mid-Terms.

Highlight of the day:
Question: How often do you go to the movies?
Answer: On the Bus.

I despair.

Sunday, April 16, 2006


Word of the week: 'Morality'

Socrates was quite an intelligent bloke. He was Greek but then nobody is perfect. He's been trying to convince me that it is better to live a 'moral' life and not be ruled by 'immoral' urges. He's doing a fairly good job of convincing me. Not bad for a bloke that has been dead for 2000+ years.

Phrase of the week: 'Knobhead'

Not quite a phrase but it is 2 words. Sort of. Big, muckle defender who have no real skill other that getting in your way, in a 'wall' kind of way. I guess that's their job but it's neither clever nor skillful.

Sight of the week: 'Fall'

Well, my neighbour is a twenty something bird with this annoying mutt that is left in her apartment all day everyday. Well, at least I think it is because everytime I go home, it's there making a racket. Anyway, we both got in the lift together. I was first out and went to exit the building, she was alittle behind. She then started to run. She ran for approx. 3 steps before succumbing to the force of gravity and ended up flat on her face before making some yelping noise that she must have learnt from her housebound mutt. Cue, a sly grin followed by a wide, toothy smile as I walked around the corner.

Abusive:Rant of the week: 'Easter'

Christians and the like. It's 'their' week. All the messages of goodwill and stuff. Why only on this day. What about the 364 other days of the year?

Song of week: 'Fabric 26 - Global Communication'

An entire album. Somewhat down-tempo but my word, does it agree with my ears. On repeat.

Hidden message of the week: love is suicide.

Saturday, April 15, 2006


Now, if I was religious I would comment on the fact that it's Easter weekend. Yesterday saw the crucification. Tomorrow will be the resurrection. And Monday will be...i'm not sure. Easter Monday?

Alas, I'm not particularly religious and will not comment on it for fear of alienating those non-Christans among us.

Instead, lets talk about birds.

I saw a Grey Tit flying about Campus yesterday and I must say that it was the 1st time I'd ever seen one over here. At home, they are relatively common along with Blackbirds and Starlings but tend not to see many especially since there is a distinct lack of 'greenary' and of course, back gardens to see them in. Magpies are very common. Can't say that I like them that much. Too bloody noisy and their 'noise' isn't a sweet melodly that is associated with other birds.

Anyway, real birds. That's what we need. With the winter chill abating, the layers are coming of and I'm all for it. Eye candy. That's what we need. Well done women, we salute you.

Friday, April 14, 2006


In a little bit of discomfort injury. Not the 'I really should have stretched before the game' injury but a cut knee. We don't play on grass, it's more like a sand/dirt hybrid. Infact, I haven't seen too many grass pitches...

Was disappointed to read that one of the Wonders of the Anicent World - the Hanging Gardens of Babylon were damaged by part of the American Army when they invaded Iraq back in 2003. The Army have issued an apology which was rather nice of them but the fact remains that they have damaged artefacts that can't really be replaced. A real shame. Thousands of years of history, partially destroyed with no real thought about what it is they are actually destroying.

In this instance, the American Army are to blame but history has proved that this isn't just an isolated incident. It seems like Armies of numerous countries are rather good at doing similiar things. Short termism wins over long termism.

The Spanish can be blamed for destroying alot of the Aztec and Mayan relics whilst trying to defeat the Natives in Central America. Who knows what was lost during those days. Perhaps countless monuments and thousands or manuscripts and carvings detailing the history of those people. Needless to say, the British are by no means blameless given that they 'owned' half the world. Even the Nazi's were at it with their book burnings.

It depresses me to think of everything that has been lost that might help us uncover the who, what, where and why questions that we, today, can only provide hypothesis' about.

Thursday, April 13, 2006


The big game.
Theology vs. English.
New upstarts /that's us/ with only 3 weeks of history and 2 games behind us against a team with a good few years of history, countless games and winner of the Campus Sports day last year.

I arrived to find them in a large circle, wearing their white and red shirts. Heads bowed and clearly in mid-prayer. From that moment, I knew we were in for it.

And so it proved.

After about 2 minutes we were 1 down. They had some nice passing movements down the left prior to their opening goal. Not long after, it was 2 with a rather speclative shot somehow deceiving our 'keeper to make it 2-0. Inbetween times, we had looked fairly compact going forward with some good passing.

We started to come more into the game and to be fair, were the better team. We definitely created the more clear cut chances. The problem being was that their defence was modelled on the outdated, 70's and 80's plan of having the big men at the back with there sole responsibility of hoofing the ball as far away as possible. Not the most 'silky'. They didn't try to find a man, instead, they were happy to clear it into row T of the stand /if we had a stand, that's were it would have ended up!/. It might not be pretty, but it was effective.

We were doing o.k. down the flanks - actually running at their monolithes and getting the ball across. That is certainly how we managed to claw a goal back. A slight hint of offside but in it went. After that we grew in confidence and played the best, we have played in the 2 and a half games upto that point. We had a few half chances. 2 fell to me. Both just slidding over the bar. The first was a glancing shot from about 18 yards out which beat the on rushing defender and looked like had the 'keeper beat before marginally going over. The 2nd chance came not long after. More difficult than the first and of similiar distance. This time, though is was a cross come shot which I had to stretch to header. I just couldn't keep the header low enough and again it sailed just over.

Half time 2-1.

2nd half was fairly even. We hit the post a couple of times before their organisation started to show with fairly fluid passing movements in evidence. Perhaps we were lucky to escape conceding but their third arrived in a somewhat messy way. A kind of goalmouth scramble saw the ball forced home.

Then, I got one back. A cross from the right, and I managed to flick it into the cover from about 12 yards. It trickled in but there was no way the 'keeper was catching it. Not sure if the precision was meant or not but it went in which was the important thing. At that point, I thought we could get it back to 3-3. Alas, it wasn't to be. Another speclative shot was missed by our 'keeper to make it 4-2, then the quickly added another, althoguh I'm not sure about the period of play before it. Our 'keeper had been fouled - in the proper sense, not the ususal 'go near the 'keeper and get a foul thing' - but he was hurt and they took advantage of hit be drilling the ball home. We managed to pull another goal back - a great solo effort to make it 5-3.

A defeat. Certainly. Against a disciplined and well organised team. Having played together alot, one would expect that. But, credit to out team. We battled and had our moments. Our lack of preparation /all 2 games of it/ showed but that is something that can be worked on. We were not disgraced by any strech of the imagination. Sports Day is coming up in May. It might come too early for us but I think we have a chance.

And...I played better. 1st half, definitely. I talled off in the 2nd but I think we did as a team. I can though, still be accused of ball watching abit to much instead of going and chasing. That needs to be worked on. But, a couple of half chances on target and a goal. Getting there.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006


Had a 4th year student come and aske me to check a mock 'conversation' that he was working on. Not sure if it was for homework or what but the basic premise was that they were both hungry and trying to decide on what they should order. They finally decided to order a Pizza and get it delievered to their apartment.

Anyway, on the whole it worked fine. Language was fairly natural, the grammar was of a good standard /please note, outside of this - my 'plaything' - my grammar is 1st class as I'm a professional at my University haha/ however there was a slight, reoccuring error. It was just 1 word. It should have been 'COKE' as in the drink. I don't buy coke at all but I'm pretty sure that on the can, the word coke is written in English /?/. Instead of writing 'COKE' the student had actually written 'COCK'.


I suppose, 'coke' and 'cock' could be easily confused especially given Korean pronouncation!

I'm not sure if the student knew what a 'cock' actually is - a male chicken, clearly. So, I politely asked him to be careful with his spelling.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006


Seems like I am somewhat addicted to CSI /the Las Vegas one/. I think I have mentioned that before. I'm even getting to know some of the things they use to help then get the evidence!

I was reading that studies in Malaysia suggested that this programme has been helping criminals 'clear up' after themselves or at least minimise the eveidence they leave behind after their criminal behave. I find that hard to beleive. Alot of the time, crime is opportunistic. It might be planned to some degree but it is also impulsive - to a degree unless of course the criminal is a serial killer who takes time to plan and watch his or her 'prey'. I would be surprised if x criminal, who is robbing a Bank or killing someone in a moment of panic actually stops to think 'hold on a minute, I've just left 10 finger prints over there. There is blood splatter which indicates where I just whacked the newly deceased. My shoes have just left an imprint in the floor and there might be eveidence of where I just broke into the house....I think I might need to bleach the place' /like blood would get rid of blood/

Even if he did, you would often leave 'something'. But, then how many crimes in the likes of Malaysia are investigated as throughly as those in a 'fictional' tv show?

Anyway, there was a throwaway /?/ sentence in last nights episode which I found ironic. Grisham (the main bloke) said to Sarah (the Bird with no life) 'Why would you want to leave, we have the best Lab in the country?'

Perhaps a sly dig at the other CSI spin offs?

Perhaps that should read Paul (the bloke with no life)

Monday, April 10, 2006


Could be a momentous week or it could be a nightmare...those are the choices. I'd prefer a momentous week alas, the variables are such that I might not achieve. Damn those in my classes. It's going to be upto you.

At least there might be a source of redemption come thursday. Football against the Theology guys. Might have to throw the game to get redemption but if it's a bad week, then I might as well go the whole hog.

Sunday, April 09, 2006


Word of the week: 'Beer'

Doesn't taste as good as it did.

Phrase of the week: 'Crapping it'

Well, are they?Chelsea, that is. 18 points ahead at the start of March, the lead at the top of the League is now down to 7 points. Mourinho says all they have to do is win their remaining home games which is true. However, one of them is against 2nd placed Man. Utd. You wouldn't would put it past Ferguson to pull this one out of the hat. The mind games have begun although Mourinho is too cool a customer to decend into a Keegan-esque rant on national tv. Chelsea have to go to Blackburn, Bolton and Newcastle. Not easy games to say the least. Could be interesting.

Sight of the week: 'minginminginminginminginmingin'

The 'dust'.

Rant:Abusive Tirade of the week: 'Homework at all that'

Copying of homework. Does my nut. What's the point? It's as if the students think that I won't notice the fact that their homework is exactly the same. Same font, type size and everything. The only thing that they have altered are their names. 2 students in completely different classes tried this. They are in for a big shock next week when they get busted infront of their classmates.

Song of the week: 'Mongrel makes his maker'

Deep and dark 'stuff' on Global Underground#26. Turned up to annoy the neighbours.

Hidden meassage of the week: we fade to grey.

Saturday, April 08, 2006


mingin mingin,mingin.mingin.
I don't care if my grammar is crap because it's my blog but the air is minging.
But, we were attacked by dust from China. Not really dust more like like actual sand from a beach. I really felt like I was covered in sand.
Certainly, the ground, the cars and windows were covered in it. Despite all my doors and windows being closed, it still managed to permeate my apartment leaving a thin film everywhere.

I've never seen this level of 'crap' in the air. Not good.

Friday, April 07, 2006


Something for your body, your mind and your soul.
Wrong is right.
It's the point of highest intensity.
A condition.
The ultimate seduction.
Not necessarily in that order.

Thursday, April 06, 2006


You know when your having a wee think to yourself, you kind of hear a little voice /your own, u nless you are my old Flatmate - the one who had upto 6 voices/that helps you decide or debate what your thinking. It confirms your thought, if you like.

Well, if we couldn't talk and had no language how could be have that 'little debate' inside your head. And if we couldn't have that help when we're thinking how could be do all the things we do. Forexample, you have just woken up and you think 'really should get up now'. But, if you had no words or language, you couldn't say that to yourself. Would you still get up?

I guess you probably would but what would make you get up in the 1st place. Is it a kind of 'instinct' thing?

Have we modified our 'instinct' by utilising this thing called language. Perhaps we have. Perhaps it is this fundamental modification that separates us from all our animal cousins. This 'language' thing. It's taken us to where we are know - rightly or wrongly - but our cousins haven't and have gone on there own path.

Which begs the question. If say, a lion doesn't have a language...i'm not a Lion, so I can't say for sure one way or the other...then how does it have the afore mentioned debate with itself about what its going to do - like get up.

It's giving me a sore head just thinking about it.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006


Pish.Shite. Utter mince.
No other words can properly express how poorly I played earlier...
We had a training game with the English Department Team.
At first we had a 4-a-side game which was fine. Scored a couple of goals, had some nice touches and my control wasn't too bad.

But, we afterwards we had a full 11 -a-side game and I was the above *expletives*

I really can't explain it. I'm motivated and want the ball all the time but when it came to controlling it or doing something constructive with it, I just couldn't. As the game went on, my confidence just drifted away. My movement slowed and my touch became worse. Suddenly, I couldn't be bothered even chasing or looked like I was going to do anything. The defender always got there first. I had a couple of shots on target but the power and accuracy was lacking.

It's as if all the *skill* /loosely worded/ has just disappeared and i'm devastated by it. I need to get out of this slumber.
Perhaps, I'm lacking fitness or sharpness as it's been awhile since I played but that withstanding, I played last year or artifical grass and played well. I wonder though if the pitch has something to do with it. It's kind of a dirt/sand mix and the ball just skids over the surface. Also, it's totally irrational but it's almost as if I'm scared to put myself about. I'm the same size if not bigger than the opposition. Physically, I should have no problem.

I should have no problem, full stop. My fitness is o.k. I can run but the 'footballing' bit...

Honestly, I'm going to have a bad day tomorrow because of it. Tomorrows classes had better watch out.

Oh yeah...and the team won 2-1. Again. Clearly, I didn't score or really do anything other than claim for corners and throw-ins.
A disaster.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006


How on earth does a football that has only been in the Scottish Football League for 2 seasons manage to get to the Cup Final. Not only that but without even meeting a Premier League team. Unbelievable.

Bloody Gretna.
fAMOUS as a place where couples alope.
Not any longer. It's now famous as a team that can take 7,000 punters to the National Stadium for the Semi-final when the population of the town is only 6,000. And, they might even get into the UEFA Cup. What a nonsense.

Hats off to them though. They have a benefactor, not exactly in the Abramovich mould, but a millionaire chain smoker who foots the bills and all for the love of the game. They have won successive championships and are now heading for the 2nd tier.
May 13th sees tham take on Hearts. Hearts must start as overwhelming favourites to win it but I wonder how 'easy' it will be for would be the shock of the millenium if Gretna won it. Far eclipsing that imfamous Celtic vs Raith Rovers League Cup win more than 10 years ago. In fact, nothing really springs to mind in terms of such a potential 'shock'.

Pressure is all on Hearts.

Monday, April 03, 2006


Busy/busy/busy. Tis the week in which Mid-Term tests need to be thought about, so that I can forewarn the students and make sure that I have actually covered the material in class. There is nothing worse than planning on using something in a test, only to find that the class hasn't actually done it.

This time around, I'm content that everything I want to test has been covered although 1 or 2 classes may be alittle behind due to M.T. but on the whole, we're looking good...the question is though - will it be a fair test. Hmm.

Sunday, April 02, 2006


Word of the week: 'Regime'

Without the aid of dirty tricks and dubious coalitions, regime change is being initiated. Out with the time wasting and intake of crap. In with the constructive use of time and the intake of fruit and vegetables and all the stuff that tastes less that ideal.

Phrase of the week: 'Whoa. It's f.kingcold'
It is. And it's not pleasant in much the same way as a headache isn't pleasant.

Sight of the week: 'Email'

Some Email that I wasted time reading. See below.

Rant:Absuive Tirade of the week: 'Depends'

Upon whether I'm tired or not. If I'm tired, the slightest thing does my nut. From things to people. Even the most innocent can just make me think 'you're a knob'. I find I say that alot these days. Example? Hmm. I'm trying to join a once a week Korean class. It's just starting up and there have been a few teething problems due to 'when' the class will be and the corresponding level. I've been in touch with the co-ordinator who then send out a 'group' Email telling all the prospective students of the level and the class time. Turns out I can't attend the class I want to because it clashes with my own teaching. Anyway, some bloke has replied to EVERYONE asking about the level saying that he knows the Korean alphabet and that he can say xyz in Korean and is wondering if he should be in the Intermediate level or the Basic level one. Bearing in mind I was tired when I read it, what is the point in sending everyone this message saying that you can do xyz and then some large diatribe about unrelated 'stuff'. Big deal if you can say xyz. Take it up with the co-ordinator, she knows best not me, some random who has no clue. I don't know you and could give a flying f>k if you can say xyz. Why are you telling me this?> I could understand if perhaps he had hit the wrong button 'reply to all' instead of 'reply to sender' but he clearly didn't since he signed the E-mail 'Peace to all'.

2 deductions I've made -rightly or wrongly - is that this person is probably Christian and is probably North American/. If I'm wrong, apologies to Christians and North Americans.

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that mood is very much related to the level of tiredness.

Song of the week: 'Fever' /Adam Freeland Extended Mix/ by Sarah Vaughan's that Fever. You know, the old one but given a new, hard once over. And to be honest I quite like so much so that I find myself muttering 'You give fever/ fever, fever...all through the night' when no-one is around whilst tapping my foot and shaking randomly. Actually, only when I'm at home but the 2 are one and the same. Hope my plants aren't too upset.

Hidden meaning of the week:expert taxbert, joking smoker. Don't you know the joker laughs and you.

Saturday, April 01, 2006


sO, it's official. 67% of us Scots will be backing England during the World Cup this summer. I find that statistic very hard to believe. If it read, 67% of Scots don't back England, then I would think that it was abit low.

Traditionally we have always backed the team who is playing England and I dare say that their will be an upsurge in the sales of Trindad and Tobago shirts as well as Swedish and whoever the other team is in Englands group. That is the Scottish way. Perhaps the smoking ban has affected the normal punter in the street into thinking that we actually want England to do well.
I though, have a little theory as to why the percentage backing England is so high...
I think it's a case of semantics.

The question /probably/ was "Will you be backing or supporting England in this years World Cup?" To which the undoubted answer was a swift, yet sarcastic "Aye right" which the /obviously English/ interviewer clearly took to mean that we would be.

Will we...will be bawes.
Will we...yer arse, we will.
Does that clear everything up?