Saturday, July 29, 2006

liberation

/
/

come on over and dance with me. yeah, i wanna make you move. Hey. alright. Yeah aha like this. giving you my best. Don't you wanna dance with me?. come on over and

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

concept

imaginary friends.
well, kind of.
the ones that are invented when you are young. The ones that go everywhere with you. The ones that you talk to but never get a reply. Imaginary conversations of what you might say if the imaginary friend was there right next to you.

Only,the friend isn't imaginary. The friend is real but not near yet the imaginary conversations continue. One sided conversations. The perfect conversations in which everything is fine. The ones you wish you were having with the real friend in an ideal world. Not a world in which distance and circumstance are in the way.

That's what I'm having.
the friend?
well, it's you.
it's you S.x
i speak to you everyday but you don't answer.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

arrest

Halfway/halfway/.

Nice to be halfway. Only another half to go.
But, what a half to go.
Next weeks schedule includes 2 x1000word assignments. 1 4 2moro. One for Friday. Inbetween are 3 assessed 40minute classes with only minimal instructions on what to teach. And I've never met the class before, so level?

Get through this week + some daylight. Perhaps.

Otherwise Edinburgh is fine. Sunny, friendly and infinitely desirable in a necessity kind of way.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

wimpish

Excuse me son. I'm lost. I'm looking for a place where I can go and get lost.
. Excuse me sir, I'm looking for a place that I was once found.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

retentive

/how to disappear completely./
.
.
.
>leave.
don't call.
don't speak.
ignore.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

material

whereto begin?
Guess, with the news i'm back in Edinburgh. Nothing really changes. It's the same as it always is, not that that is a bad thing. Things come and go but Edinburgh stays the same. Even the direction of the wind - west to east. Always.

Alas, teaching practice started. No slow build up to it. Try a hardcore 'you have a class of 12 new students in 3 hours - get ready. Oh, and you're getting assessed on your teaching from tomorrow. Oh and the 1st assignment which is a 1000 words long needs to be completed by Monday. I'm 3 days into the course and I'm knackered. Could be jetlag but more likely it's because I have no free time. Go to School from 9 to 5. Go home, eat dinner and then more studying. Go to bed. Not exactly how I visualised my holiday. Counting down the days. 17 more. Just get through it. That's my only thought. Pass it.
And it will be passed.

Laugh. Not just chuckle or a fake haha. Laugh. An uncontrollable, belly deep one. One in which it hurts your sides and makes your eyes water. How often is it done? Answer=not enough.
Thanks guys for Saturday. That's what I miss. It's not rocket science. It's fairly simple really. Quality company and belly aching laughs.
Which seamlessly leads to the observation that Korean time is almost up.

I could offer numerous reasons and justifications and perhaps the same amount to counter the original reasons but ultimately it's just a gut feeling. Nothing that words can fully articulate. I suspect it might be comparable to married couples who always tell you that they 'just knew' that they should be together and that is all I can offer. 'Just know'.

Perhaps something extraordinary will occur to change that but I somehow doubt it, no matter how much I urge it to. It's either meant or not meant to occur.

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

exfoliate

Time for a sharp exit.
Tomorrow in fact.

Cathay Pacific and B.A. are my awaiting chariots. Make a change from the cold yet efficent Lufthansa and the rather ageing KLM employees who i'm sure are very good at there job.

5 weeks at home which could well become longer depending on how things turn out.
over andout.